Relief — 10 Seconds at a Time
Give me
10 seconds.
That’s really all I’m asking.
In 10 seconds, it is possible to experience relief from the pain and struggle that have consumed so much of your attention.
You don’t have to solve your problem. You don’t have to stop your thoughts. You don’t have to change your feelings. You don’t even have to believe this will work.
Give me 10 seconds. I’ll show you how to get there—and we’ll see what happens.
A different possibility
10 seconds may be all it takes to discover that something different is possible.
For those few seconds, you don’t have to solve the problem, change your thoughts or feelings, or know what comes next.
You may simply experience relief.
And once you’ve experienced it, you know something you didn’t know before:
That space exists.
Start Where You Are
Where Is Your Pain Most Intense?
Your crisis may take many forms. What matters right now is where the pain has you caught. The circumstances may be different, but when something important hurts, it’s easy to become caught in thoughts, feelings and reactions that keep the pain alive.
Infidelity
The shock. The questions. The images. The desperate need to know what happened—and what happens next.
Learn More →
Relationship Crisis
Conflict. Distance. Rejection. Uncertainty. Trying desperately to get someone else to understand, respond, change—or come back.
Learn More →
Caught in a Pattern
You may understand the problem and still find yourself returning to the same thoughts, feelings and reactions.
Learn More →
Something Else
Your crisis may not fit neatly into a category. It doesn’t have to.
Start with what hurts.
The Journey
There's a Process. And It Works.
A simple path that leads you to 10 seconds that might change the course of your crisis.
1
The 10 Steps
Learn the 10 Steps that show you the way—offering first relief, and then answers.
2
The 10 Seconds
The Steps lead you to 10 seconds where you can stop struggling with what is happening.
You don’t have to solve anything. For those few seconds, there is space. That space may be experienced as relief.
3
Return
Once you’ve experienced that space, it becomes an anchor point.
You know it’s there. Follow the Steps and return to it again and again.
4
Discover What Opens
As that space becomes more available, something surprising can happen.
New feelings, thoughts, answers and possibilities may emerge that you couldn’t see before.
Carry the process with you. Use it whenever you need it. 10 Steps. 10 Seconds at a Time.
The Portal
10 Seconds Can Open the Door to Something New.
They are the portal.
For just 10 seconds, you don’t have to solve the problem, stop your thoughts, change your feelings, force yourself to let go, or make another person understand.
You don’t have to do anything with any of it.
For a moment, you no longer have to stay caught in the struggle.
- Space between one thought and the next.
- Space between the feeling and the reaction.
- Space between what you desperately want to happen and your need to make it happen.
And that space is relief.
Something New May Appear
We don’t decide what that will be in advance.
A new thought may emerge. A different feeling. An answer you hadn’t considered. A coping pattern you suddenly understand differently. A possibility that wasn’t available before.
You may even find yourself wondering:
Where did that thought come from?
Where did that feeling come from?
I never considered that before.
There is finally room for something new to appear.
The Experience
Relief Changes What's Possible.
The first experience may last only seconds.
That’s okay.
You don’t have to hold onto it. You don’t have to make it permanent. And you can’t force it to happen.
You create the context and see what happens.
Once you’ve experienced that space, it can become an anchor point—a place you can return to again and again.
As you return, the space may become more available. The familiar patterns may loosen. The intensity may diminish.
And possibilities you couldn’t see while consumed by the crisis may begin to emerge.
Your world gets bigger.
Why I Do This Work
What I've Learned From My Own Crisis—and From Helping Others
The 10 Steps and the 10-second experience didn’t begin as a theory.
They grew partly out of my own infidelity crisis. I had to find a way not merely to survive, but to experience relief, find inner peace, and eventually discover the freedom to move forward.
They also grew out of decades of working with people through emotionally intense crises.
Again and again, I witnessed something significant happen when the right context was created: a genuine emotional experience of relief that opened the possibility for healing and transformation.
Over time, those experiences became a process—
10 Steps that can lead to 10 seconds of relief, space and freedom.
I’m deeply grateful to the hundreds of people who shared their stories with me and trusted me to walk alongside them as they discovered what might be possible beyond the crisis.
And strangely enough, I’m grateful for my own crisis as well.
It opened a world I probably would have missed.
— Bob Huizenga
You Don't Have to Believe Me
Experience It.
Reading about relief isn’t the same as experiencing it. So I’m not asking you to accept a theory, learn an entire program, or decide where your life should go.
I’m asking for something much smaller.
Give me 10 seconds.
I’ll show you how to create the context.
Then we’ll see what happens.